who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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