After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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