hell yes lets make some ravioli
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Randomize
