I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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