Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
