first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
