i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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