when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
only if we run a train.
done.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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