Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
