You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
