oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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