I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I've blown a few things in my day
I cut my penus on the lid.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
