I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i think i have herpe
just one?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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