I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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