Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
