her vagine was all disorganized.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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