i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
thus making me awesome and them whores
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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