No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
