Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
