it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
