So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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