So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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