Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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