I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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