Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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