Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
