sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
