One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I'm too high and old for this...
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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