Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
