so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
