we're blogging at a bar
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
