The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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