I think I just saw someone hide a body.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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