I got her a Nickelback box set.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
