I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
