just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I need water and some morals
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
