Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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