I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
