5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
