Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Randomize
