Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
