last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Randomize