I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
