Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You've changed since you got that strap on
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
