I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Randomize