I hate all girls vehemently.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Boobs are out for the taking
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
