Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Me too!
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
