we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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