I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
