I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
